1. feeling or showing envy of someone or their achievements.
2. feeling or showing suspicion of someone’s unfaithfulness in a relationship.
3. fiercely protective or vigilant of one’s rights or possessions.
4. (of God) demanding faithfulness and exclusive worship.
That’s me, Maya the terrible terrier, a slave to the Green Eyed Monster of jealousy. I’m pretty sure you know what I mean since there are enough descriptions for the affliction listed above to take in the entire Universe, even God gets the green eyes on occasion.
When Tessa jumps up to interrupt my special petting time with mom I get really jealous and with lips curling back from my razor sharp canines I let her know, stand back bitch or prepare to meet your maker. And Tess, being a cat and having absolutely no respect for boundaries will insinuate herself onto mom’s lap without a concern. Mom calms me down with her voice, but I make a note to have a word with Miss Tessa later.
This feeling of jealousy just overtakes me and my wild wolf nature springs to the fore. Mom is mine and no one else can share her love. Ok, so in an ideal world I could claim that with some truth, but up against Seamus and Tessa each vying for her love I don’t stand a chance of having it all for myself. Is it even possible to make such a demand?
You should see the wicked scowl I give to Seamus when he attempts to get between me and mom. He knows, and I know to back off when he is getting his morning massage and feeling all lovey, dovey. If I intrude then I get this Shih Tzu sneer of tiny, wicked little teeth that cannot even decimate a bone. I am so not afraid of him, but I do respect his right to be jealous.
Mom’s reaction is to use her quiet voice.
“Maya, easy little girl, there are enough pets and love for each of you.”
And even though I know she is right the monster rises thick and fierce when I feel her attention being taken by someone else.
Food is another issue of contention. A bone can have me snapping and attacking Seamus who is just messing with my mind because he had first dibs on the stupid bone and leaves it for me to finish off. No one messes with a doggie’s bone when intent on chewing and I do not share my bone until I am done, then I become the most generous and benevolent of Cairns. Maya, the compassionate you can call me and that is who I strive to be; but I am filled with so much anger; and having been abandoned and abused I have the right to be jealous and angry; or so my mind tell me.
Mom says my anger arises from unresolved emotions or unsatisfied desires that continue to run my life (Seamus and Tessa say I am just mental). When I cocked my head at mom with ears at attention she sighed and opened a book and began to read.
“I know you may not understand this Maya, my love, but the Bhagavad Gita, an ancient Indian text puts it very well. ”
He who controls his mind and has cut off desire and anger realizes the Self; he knows that God’s bliss is nearer than near. Closing his eyes, his vision focused between the eyebrows, making the in-breath and the out-breath equal as they pass through his nostrils, he controls his senses and his mind, intent upon liberation; when desire, fear, and anger have left him, that man is forever free.
Then mom looked at me and realized she was reading to a small doggie and she closed the book and began to laugh.